posted on Tuesday, February 27, 2007 12:15 AM by Jim

Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

No. 6:  “It’s up to Cooper. If he don’t screw this thing up, we should win.’’ -- Ozzie on Don Cooper.

No. 5:   "Usually the manager wants his players to get a hit.  I cheer for him not to get a hit because then he will have to run the bases.'' -- Ozzie on Jose Contreras.

No. 4:  "That thing might bite you, and you might be dead in this desert." -- Ozzie on a random bee.

No. 3:  "Hermie told me that A.J. is a little slow running the bases. I told him, no kidding, what have you been watching over the past two years?" -- Ozzie on A.J. Pierzynski's ankle.

No. 2:  "They asked [Freddy Garcia] who was crazier, [Charlie] Manuel or Guillen?  I won.  I'm the No. 1 crazy guy." -- Ozzie on himself.

No. 1:  "I don't think you're going to see Mackowiak in center field that much -- I want to keep my job. And I think Mackowiak wants to keep his job, too.''  -- Ozzie on Rob Mackowiak.

Comments

# re: Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 12:36 AM by Gregory Pratt
I'm playing fantasy baseball for the first time in my life. I spent much of yesterday and today at school dealing with the other owners and trying to pry players away. (It was an autopick.)

Someone had BJ Ryan and I was trying to get him from her and I said to my friend, "I'm angling for a BJ!" and immediately thought of you.

I did get him, by the way, for Jose Contreras.
Currently, my team is:

McCann
Swisher
Utley
Wright
Carlos Guillen
Chad Tracy
Soriano
Abreu
Ibanez
Hafner

and my bench has Brian Roberts, Ivan Rodriguez, Richie Sexson, Jacque Jones Frank Thomas and Aaron Rowand.
Aaron'll be gone soon, though. I don't need his poor production.

Pitchers are Billingsley, Peavy, Lackey, Kazmir and Hamels, with Wickman, Ryan, Nathan and Mike Gonzalez in the pen.

I've never played FB before but I think that's a filthy team.

Anyway, back to the point -- angling for a BJ = memory of you and your site.
Hooray!

# re: Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 8:12 PM by Jim Margalus
"I said to my friend, "I'm angling for a BJ!" and immediately thought of you."

I don't think I'll be using that for a blurb on my site.

# re: Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 9:56 PM by Gregory Pratt
Probably for the best.
That dogshit picture would serve better.

# re: Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 9:56 PM by Gregory Pratt
Oh my! That comes off as an insult and I didn't mean it to in any sense.

I'm channeling Ozzie. Soryy.

# re: Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 9:56 PM by Gregory Pratt
Sorry -- fuck!

# re: Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 10:59 PM by Jim Margalus
Those last three comments = memory of this movie line:

http://tinyurl.com/yw68pw

# re: Top 6 Ozzie Guillen quotes of Spring Training (so far)

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 11:17 PM by Gregory Pratt
We <i>should</i> get an apartment together. Two bloggers of vastly different ages living under one roof? Just don't bring smelly pirate hookers and I won't have to kill them just to watch them die.

This all reminds me of the time I cackled in my AP English class for five minutes without any reason and had to explain to my teacher, after, that I wasn't high as hell but had no explanation for my laughter.

I really wasn't drugged out. Though I now joke that if I ever decide to binge, I'll do it right before that period. I guess I'll have to add, "Before I check out SoxMachine" too.